


passing into another loveliness

by hollyandvice (hiasobi_writes)



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-17 20:56:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29972190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hiasobi_writes/pseuds/hollyandvice
Summary: Walking up to the newly-rebuilt Tower to a nine year-old girl barreling into his knees isn't at all how Steve thought his life would end up post-snap.After losing Tony to the Stones, Steve learns to love Morgan in her father's stead amidst the years he spends years scouring the earth for a way to bring Tony back.
Relationships: Pepper Potts & Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), Steve Rogers & Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), Steve Rogers/Tony Stark (one-sided)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 47
Collections: Marvel Trumps Hate 2020





	passing into another loveliness

**Author's Note:**

  * For [magicasen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/magicasen/gifts).



> Written for magicasen for MTH 2020. Hope you enjoy, darlin!
> 
> Title from a Thomas Bailey Aldrich quote.

Walking up to the newly-rebuilt Tower to a nine year-old girl barreling into his knees isn't at all how Steve thought his life would end up post-snap. Either of them. After Thanos and the three years he'd spent scouring the earth — and the universe — for any way to bring everyone back, he'd never thought he'd find hope again. Those last two years had _hurt_ in ways that Steve had forgotten he could hurt. And then, after Tony—

Well. After Tony.

After Tony, it hadn't seemed like anything would ever matter ever again. But then Pepper had insisted that he come to the reading of Tony's will, and when he'd heard his name listed as Morgan's secondary caregiver, he hadn't known what to say or do about it. He'd almost tried to refuse, but the tired, achingly tender look in Pepper's eyes had said all that needed to be said. Even then, she'd spoken the words into existence as well.

"He wanted her to know you, Steve. He wanted her to love you. Just like—"

"Okay." He'd cut her off, not ready to hear the words that she'd been about to say. He hadn't wanted to know what she thought of him. What Tony had thought of him.

It hadn't mattered in the intervening five years. Pepper and Morgan had both made it abundantly clear what Tony had thought of him.

Now, with Morgan clinging to his waist and the wind half knocked out of him, he's grateful for Pepper's gentle insistence.

"Hey, Buttercup," he says, ruffling her hair. He's struck as he always is about how it feels under his fingers, so close to _his_ , but never, ever the same. "You still giving your mother hell?"

Morgan unburies her face from his stomach and grins up at him. "Always, Uncle Steve."

Steve smiles and hoists her up onto his hip. She makes a face at him, just petulant enough to put on a show for the SI employees streaming in and out of the building around them, but not so petulant that Steve will put her down. She's perfected that art over the last few years, and Steve can't help but see Tony in every part of her cheeky smile.

He'd thought that would get better over the years. Instead, it's only gotten worse.

The doors to the Tower slide open to admit them. Steve catches sight of Morgan's bodyguard — Tyler, a young man Happy had trained himself, and the fifth such bodyguard in the three years since she Pepper, and Happy had moved back to the newly renovated Tower — rushing toward them.

"How many times have I told you not to run off, Miss Morgan?"

Morgan rolls her eyes. "The proximity sensor I set up said Uncle Steve was right outside. Everyone in the building has had a thorough background check and no reason to want to harm me." The words sound as though she's recited them a dozen times. Probably because she has. "In fact, if they chose to harm me, they would have found themselves out of a job or on the wrong end of Uncle Steve's fist."

" _Miss Morgan_ ,"

"You're right, Tyler. It would have been both."

Tyler catches Steve's eye, but he offers the man no commiseration. He's too caught up in the familiarity of this routine and the comfort of Morgan on his hip.

"Miss Morgan—"

"She's right, you know," Steve says. "I would have put my fist through anyone's face if they dared lay a cruel or ill-willed finger on her."

Tyler huffs. "You're not helping my case here, Captain."

"Maybe not." Steve definitely isn't helping the man's case, but there's no reason to let him know that. "But it's the truth."

Tyler rolls his eyes to the heavens, looking for all the world like he's praying to God for strength. Or Tony. That's who Steve would be praying to. The universe's savior. "The least you could do is stop indulging her by carrying her all over the place."

Steve laughs outright at that. "There's no way that's happening until she tells me to, Tyler." He turns to look at her. "Do you want me to put you down, Buttercup?"

She tucks her head into his neck, shaking it. Steve puts a protective hand between her shoulder blades and holds her close. "I'll see her back up to the penthouse, Tyler. Why don't you go and get some rest."

Tyler straightens. "No can do, sir. I need to see her back to the safety of the penthouse before I can relinquish my protective detail."

Steve raises an eyebrow. Happy trained this one better than the others. "Very good," he says. "Then why don't you lead the way."

Tyler nods and turns away, keeping Morgan in his peripheral vision as he leads them to the elevator bank. Steve will have to let Happy know to make sure to keep an eye on this one, and to keep him around for as long as he can. There can never be too many people that care about Morgan, and Steve will only be around for so long.

Pepper's waiting at the elevator when Steve and Morgan make it to the penthouse. "Morgan Maria Stark, what on earth were you thinking?" Morgan buries her face in Steve's shoulder again, but Pepper isn't having any of that. She holds out her hand. "My keycard?"

Morgan keeps trying to hide in Steve's bulk, but Pepper is the one person he won't cross when it comes to Morgan. He lifts his shoulder, gently jostling her.

"Come on, Buttercup. You gotta listen to your mom."

"At least until I'm eighteen and get my inheritance."

"At least until you're eighteen and get your inheritance," Steve agrees. "Now, hand over your mother's keycard."

Morgan sighs, but slips the keycard from her sleeve and into her mother's hand. Pepper gives her a sharp look. "Please tell me your Uncle Clint hasn't been teaching you pickpocketing tricks again."

"Uncle Clint hasn't been teaching me pickpocketing tricks again," Morgan recites dutifully.

Pepper gives Steve a pained look. He adjusts Morgan on his hip so he can look her in the eye. "Buttercup. Morgan. You have to listen to what your mom says. She's trying to keep you safe. You know that, right?"

"Why, though?"

Steve stares down into Morgan's eyes — _Tony's_ eyes — and swallows around the lump in his throat. "Because she loves you very much, Morgan. She keeps you safe and fed and clothed. She makes sure you have the best people in your corner, that you're cared for and loved. She does so much for you, Buttercup, and it's important to show her that you know that by doing what she says."

"Sure, but that's just cuz she's my mom. It doesn't mean I have to listen to _everything_ she says."

"She works so hard to make sure that you remember your dad the way he really was. She sits with you every night and tells you about him. How strong and brave he was. All the things she loved him for. You get to love your dad like that every night before you go to bed. Isn't that the best thing she can give you?"

Morgan looks away, hiding her eyes from her mother behind her bangs.

"She's so good to you, Buttercup. I hope you can show her respect by doing what she asks."

Morgan pushes away from him, and he sets her down without needing to be asked. She walks over to Pepper and hugs her. "I'm sorry for running away, Mom."

Steve looks up, but Pepper isn't looking at Morgan. She's looking at him. "I know, honey." Her voice is warm and soft and Steve knows she's talking to him just as much as she is to Morgan. "I know. Just please don't do it again."

Steve looks away. He can't offer Pepper what she's asking for. Not yet. As long as there's even a _slight_ chance to save Tony, he has to take it. He has to.

Pepper sighs. "Go wash up, sweetheart."

Steve looks back in time to catch Morgan looking at him over her shoulder. She turns away when she catches him looking.

"Come on," Pepper says. Her voice is heavy and tired. "I've got dinner almost ready."

"You know you don't have to—"

"Steve. Let me do this. I need to do this."

Steve doesn't argue. Virginia Potts is just as fierce as her late husband, just in different ways. Steve won't push any more than this, because that would mean losing his last tie to Tony. "What can I do to help?"

Pepper raises a single, perfect eyebrow at him. "You can go see what your goddaughter is up to right now. We both know you're terrible in the kitchen."

Steve would protest that it had only been the one time, but they both know that's a lie. He ducks his head and turns away to head to Morgan's room.

Steve knocks on the frame of the open door. "You getting ready in here, Buttercup?"

Morgan looks up at him with the shrewd sort of insight that would not have been out of place on her father's face. Steve's breath catches, and it takes more effort than he'd expected to stay present. The pull of the past had been alluring when he'd first awoken in the 21st century, but he'd thought— he'd _hoped_ that he was beyond that. Evidently he wasn't, and losing Tony had just brought all of those tendencies back to the forefront of his mind.

"Why are you and Mom so overprotective?"

Steve blinks hard. He knows the right answer to this question, but he's still dragging himself out of the past, and if he could just bet back to the moment, everything would be fine.

"Please don't lie to me."

"Because we're terrified of losing you."

Morgan's eyes widen. "What?"

Steve swallows, trying not to regret the honesty. He knows Morgan would have known if he'd lied or told a half-truth, but at least then they could all stay in that lie for a little longer. They could pretend that Tony's ghost doesn't still leave his shadow over all of them every day. But it's too late now. The words are out in the open, and Steve can't take them back. "We're terrified of what could happen to you. The things the world could do to you, being who you are—"

"Being my father's daughter."

She sounds so much older than her age, and Steve's chest clenches with the knowledge. Not that it matters. She would be this mature with or without Steve's knowledge.

"Is that all I'm ever going to be?"

That startles Steve. He takes three steps into her room before he realizes the boundary he's crossing. "Can I come in?"

Morgan wrinkles her nose. "You already are."

"Okay." Steve gestures at the empty space on the bed next to her. "Can I sit, then?"

Morgan nods and scoots to one side of the bed. Steve settles down beside her. He doesn't face her, but he leaves his body turned toward her, trying to be welcoming without being overbearing. He's had five years to work on it, and he's still no better than he was back at the beginning. He searches for the words to help her understand, but when they come, they come like sludge from his deepest soul.

"You know your mother loved your father very much."

"I know." Morgan's voice is quiet.

"We both see a lot of him in you."

"I know that too."

Steve hesitates. He knows that he wants to say, but he doesn't know what he truly wants to convey. Not really. He closes his eyes and tries to find the truth that he himself doesn't know. The truth to who this brilliant, loving, charismatic girl is to him. Who she'll always be. "That part is never going to go away."

"You could have just said yes. There's no reason to get all moody on me."

"I'm not done talking." Steve puts a hint of steel in his voice. Morgan sits up a little straighter in response. "We both see your father in you because you are everything to us that he could never be. He was his own man before your mom or I got to meet him. You, though? You we can protect from a lot of the pain he went through. That's what we want. That's all we want."

"Dad was a superhero. He didn't go through any pain."

Steve grimaces. "He was a man before he was a superhero, Buttercup. And he was a boy before that. He didn't deserve what people put him through."

"What are you talking about?"

Steve exhales slowly. "Do you really believe that your Uncle Clint has never been in pain? I know he's told you stories."

"Yeah, but he's different."

"Is he? He's a superhero, just like your dad was. We both know his life hasn't been all sunshine and roses, not even if we just focus on the time since he started working for SHIELD."

"So what are you saying? That Dad lost people he loved too?"

"I'm saying that your dad didn't have people looking out for him when he was your age. Not like you do."

"I don't see what that has to do with me."

Steve tucks a stray lock of Morgan's hair behind her ear. Her eyes are wide and pleading, and if Steve had taken even a minute to think about what he was saying, he'd have said something very different five minutes ago. He doesn't want to be the one to tell her, but someone's going to. She deserves to know.

"Uncle Steve—"

"Your grandfather Howard wasn't a very good father. He had very strict ideas about what Tony should and shouldn't do, and did everything he could to keep him in line. Your dad... he was smarter than anyone in the world at that point in time, and everyone around him knew it. He surpassed Howard before he was your age, and Howard knew it. If there was one thing your dad wanted for you, it was to be surrounded by people that love you for as long as he could manage it."

"Then why isn't he here?"

It isn't the first time that Steve's had to remind Morgan about how many people her father saved using the Infinity Stones. He's equally sure that it won't be the last. That doesn't make it any easier to hear her ask why her father isn't around to tuck her in at night anymore. "Buttercup—"

Morgan gets to her feet. "I'm gonna go wash my hands. I'll see you at dinner."

Steve knows a dismissal when he hears one. "Okay, Buttercup. I'll see you in a minute."

When Steve makes it back to the kitchen, Pepper's dishing out the lasagna onto four plates. "You wanna take those out to the table?"

"Did you have a chance to—"

"I'm not going to talk about it with you right now, Steve. Not before dinner."

"We only have until midnight."

"And I told you, I'm not going to talk about it with you right now. Dinner first."

Steve exhales. He grabs all four plates and follows Pepper out to the dining room. The door opens and Happy joins them a moment later. He kisses Pepper's cheek, a deference that Steve doesn't actually need at this point. They finish setting the table just in time for Morgan to join them. For Steve, joining the three of them at the dinner table is as easy as breathing. They don't say grace, but Pepper does speak the same quiet words of thanks that she speaks every year. Thanks for their continued health and safety. Thanks for the health and safety of the world around them. Thanks for the man that made this life possible for all of them.

All around the world, people are celebrating Salvation Day and the Savior himself in their own way. In this home, though, there is only one way to celebrate.

Together.

This morning would have been the brunch with Peter and Bruce, with Clint and Fury and Carol. Big to-dos where Pepper still had to make speeches about her now ex-husband and all that he meant to them. The world didn't know that she'd moved on and found her own slice of happiness with Happy and Morgan, and that was the way she liked it. Even as she put SI back together from the ground up, there was no need to bring the paparazzi into Morgan's life any sooner than was necessary,

This was the life she had chosen. Steve doesn't get to throw stones. Not when he's still got his head buried so far in the sands of the past that sometimes he forgets to crawl out in time for Salvation Day. This year it had been sheer luck coupled with Clint tracking him down in the middle of an ancient Buddhist temple that had gotten him here in time. Even then, he'd waited until the last possible minute to come back.

Facing up to the world that Tony had left behind was almost too much sometimes. Facing up to the daughter he left behind was always too much.

Dinner is quiet, and it isn't until they've eaten and Steve's been exiled to the kitchen that Morgan asks.

"What did you find this time?"

Steve doesn't mean to startle, but her words are almost enough to have him dropping the plate that he's washing. "What?"

"To try to bring Dad back. What did you find this time?"

That's enough to make Steve turn and face her. Five years he's been out in the world ever spare chance he could sneak and she'd never asked before. "What are you talking about?"

"I hacked into Mom's email. Don't worry, I already 'fessed up," she says before Steve can get too indignant. "She's the one that explained what the email meant anyway. You said whatever it was we had to do it tonight. So, what did you find out?"

"Morgan..." Steve shakes his head helplessly. "It's complicated."

"Then uncomplicate it. What did you find out?"

Pepper steps into the kitchen behind Morgan. For an instant, Steve thinks he's off the hook, that she'll insist that Morgan let the grown-ups talk about this. Instead she crosses her arms and meets Steve's gaze directly.

"Pepper—"

"She deserves to know, Steve. Especially if what you said in the encrypted part of the message was true."

Morgan turns to look at her mother. "There was more?"

Pepper doesn't look at Morgan. She keeps her gaze steady on Steve until he relents.

"There's a ritual. It took me almost a year to track down an original transcription and another six months to get everything we would need to perform it."

"But it could bring my dad back."

Steve doesn't let his expression reveal even an ounce of the triumph he feels at the hope in Morgan's voice. "It could."

"At what cost?"

Morgan looks over her shoulder at Pepper. "Mom?"

Steve's throat tightens at the unyielding expression on Pepper's face. "Does it matter?"

"Of course it matters!" Pepper's lips thin as soon as the outburst passes her lips. "Of course it matters." And then, "You're important to her too."

"What?" Morgan turns to look at Steve just in time to catch his wince. "Uncle Steve?"

"It's nothing, Morgan, just—"

"I could lose you?"

Steve doesn't have the words to answer. He closes his eyes and bows his head.

"No."

"Morgan—"

"No, Uncle Steve. If I'm more than my father's daughter, then you're more than his co-leader. You're important to me, Uncle Steve. Just as important and Mom and Happy and everybody else. You're _important_ to me, and I wouldn't trade you for anyone."

"Not even your father?"

"Steve—"

"No." Morgan hadn't flinched at the snarl in Steve's voice. It's a terrifying reminder of the sharp look in Tony's eyes as he'd ripped his heart out and the nanite casing off his chest to shove them both into Steve's hands. "No, I won't trade you for Dad."

The silence presses against Steve's ears, oppressive and damning. "What did you say?"

"I said I won't trade you for dad. I love you both, but you're the one that's here with me. If you've really been spending the last five years trying to find a way to bring him back, then you can spend five more years finding a way to bring him back without costing me you."

"It's not like I'm going to die."

"Then what's it going to do?"

Steve hesitates, and that's all the answer Morgan needs.

"No. If it's worse than you dying, then it's even more unacceptable. You find something else, Uncle Steve. You find something else, and you do it while still making sure to be in town for Mom's birthday and Happy's and Uncle Bucky's and Uncle Sam's. Not just mine. No," she says before Steve can argue. "I'm tired of living with you as a shadow, Uncle Steve. I want you to be here, in my life, watching me grow up. Isn't that what dad wanted too?"

It's the last bit that cuts Steve off at the knees. Tony's will had made his desires on that front abundantly clear, and Steve had been flaunting those desires for the last two years. Count on Morgan to call him out on it.

When Steve looks up at Pepper, she's smiling down at Morgan with tears in her eyes. That's all Steve needs to see to know his answer. Still, he hesitates. He looks back down at Morgan. "It could take me even longer if I do it your way."

"That's fine. You'll figure it out when the time is right."

Steve almost pushes again. Almost argues harder. But there's no point, truly, and right now all he wants is to be with his family. He sighs, and from the look on Morgan's face, she knows that she's won. "Alright. It's your call, Buttercup."

"Good. Now, get back into the living room. I want to hear stories about my dad."

"But you've heard all my stories," Steve protests with a laugh.

"That's okay. I'm sure you can think of a few new ones."

"You know what, you may just be right about that." Steve lets Morgan take his hand and drag him back into the living room. And if midnight finds him tucking her into bed instead of bringing Tony back to life, well, that's the life she chose for him. He's not about to do wrong by Tony's daughter, and if that means learning to live again, then he will do just that.


End file.
